> love, lust, marriage

love - when your eyes meet across a crowded room.
lust - when your tongues meet across a crowded room.
marriage - when you try to lose your spouse in a crowded room.

love - when intercourse is called "making love.
lust - when intercourse is called "screwing."
marriage - when intercourse is a town in pennsylvania.

love - when you argue over how many children to have.
lust - when you argue over who gets the wet spot.
marriage - when you argue over whose idea it was to have kids.

love - when you share everything you own.
lust - when you steal everything they own.
marriage - when the bank owns everything.

love - when it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
lust - when the relationship is over if you don't climax.
marriage - when ... uh ... what's a climax?

love - when you phone each other just to say, "hi."
lust - when you phone each other to pick a hotel room.
marriage - when you phone each other to bitch.

love - when you write poems about your partner.
lust - when all you write is your phone number.
marriage - when all you write is checks.

love - when your only concern is for your partner's feelings.
lust - when your only concern is to find a room with mirrors all round.
marriage - when your only concern is what's on tv.

love - when you are proud to be seen in public with your partner.
lust - when you only see each other naked.
marriage - when you never see each other awake.

love - when your heart flutters every time you see the other.
lust - when your groin twitches every time you see the other.
marriage - when your wallet empties every time you see the other.

love - when all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.
lust - when the song on the radio determines how you do it.
marriage - when you listen to talk radio.

love - when breaking up is something you try not to think about.
lust - when staying together is something you try not to think about.
marriage - when just getting through the day is your only thought.

love - when you're only interested in doing things with your partner.
lust - when you're only interested in doing things to your partner.
marriage - when you're only interested in your golf score.